A lot of people in this town use those wireless headsets with their cell phones. There’s a lot of good reasons to hate those, but my biggest complaint about them is people using them when they’re just walking around town.

On my way home last night, I was feeling pretty crappy (that sick business). I passed this chubby guy in a lime green shirt, a purple tie, and a black fleece vest, with a rolly-bag and an armload of crap. Just as I was passing him, he said, “There’s hope,” in the kind of voice you’d expect to hear from a chubby guy in a green shirt and purple tie. He may have had a hands-free thing, since his hands WERE full, but he definitely looked like he was talking to me. I guess I looked like I needed a little up-lifting.

Then, on my way in this morning, I was having a cigarette (I know, I’m a terrible person). At the same place I passed the guy yesterday, another dude said, “Doesn’t wo-ork,” in a sort of sing-songy lilt. Perhaps he meant smoking, as a weight-loss strategy? His hands weren’t full, so if he was using a headset, he’s just an asshat.

Now I’m wondering if I’m the kind of guy that looks like he needs unsolicited input from strangers, or if these guys just don’t know the Man Laws. I’ll let you know how the walk home tonight goes.